Title

And we’d subject our friends and colleagues to such strait

For when we said the vows on that date, our fate

Was unknowingly marked with contempt and hate

You came late: i’d lost some weight

I zipped my dress but then had to wait

And then you walked in; 11:28

But that smile made me weak and my anger dissipate

We said the words; captain, first mate

You kissed the bride; I took the bait

I was your wife; 12:28

4 years pass, along comes Kate

But she’s a girl, who does her father irritate

One more year passes and my period is late

I’m hoping it’s a boy; his name wud be Nate

Baby comes along

I name her Faith

His anger and hate, like an enormous spate

Two girls are not worth the baby weight

The new wife is here; I must accept my fate

Dinner must be served; I must the carrots grate

For now my place is with the plates

My womb replaced by my mate’s

A boy should soon follow; not much time to waste

Forgive my endless chatter; nothing but mere prate

These carrots will not themselves grate

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It had to be Hugh…

It’s love I feel, no question
Not hero-worship, obsession
With emotions overt, but no way to flirt
I can only take comfort in Google Alert

While I’m watching Van Helsing
It’s you that I’ll dream of harassing
And while we’re rehashing the roles you’ve been acting
You be Wolverine and I’ll be Jean

But when that fated day comes
And all you can flash are your gums
I’d still stick with you for if only you knew
It’s you, it’s you; it’s always been Hugh!

Is this the end?

No. No, it is not.

I suck, I know. There’s no excuse. I could say I was busy (which I was, but not enough); i could say I travelled; I could say I was ill but truth is, it was laziness and nothing more.

And so I solemnly pledge to never ever miss another day of blogging. I intend to continue the #100BeautyDays tag (just maybe not in exact sequence) and also include a little bit of vlogging as well as hauls, reviews, tutorials and all that good stuff.

Le Creed:

I solemnly swear to live up to the Vanity Enabler title and perform the duties that come with it. And you, my readers, reserve the right to strip me of all rights and titles should I fall short henceforth.

Cross my heart-shaped lipbalm

Cross my heart-shaped lipbalm

Be Luxe. Be Lovely… you know the rest!

The Indie Author Manifesto

Indie Hero

Indie Authors.

Each and every one of us should post this on our websites, blogs, etc.

THE INDIE AUTHOR MANIFESTO by Mark Coker @ Smashwords:

Indie Author Manifesto

THE INDIE AUTHOR MANIFESTO


We indie authors believe all writers are created equal, that all writers are endowed with natural creative potential, and that writers have an unalienable right to exercise, explore and realize their potential through the freedom of publication. 

I hold these truths to be self-evident:

  1. I am an indie author
  2. I have experienced the pleasure and satisfaction that comes from self-publishing
  3. I have a right to publish
  4. My creative control is important to me.  I decide when, where and how my writing graduates to become a published book.
  5. Indie does not mean “alone.”  I choose my partners.
  6. I shall not bow beholden or subservient to any publisher. In my business relationships, I seek partnership, fairness, equity and mutually aligned interests.
  7. We indie…

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DealDey – Laser Permanent Hair Removal for Face or Underarm

DealDey – Laser Permanent Hair Removal for Face or Underarm.

 

Remember that facial hair removal post I was going to do? This just rendered that redundant. Get a coupon. FAST!

How to clean your make up brushes

Was gonna do a similar post but this just saved me the trouble. Enjoy.

iRant: You’re a Spinster? So what? ‘Spin’ it in your favour!

Okay so you’re still single. The clock is ticking, there’s pressure from home and wedding bells keep ringing but you don’t seem to be hearing them from where you stand.
I get it. Frustrated doesn’t even begin to cut it; plus the worried looks from your mom and aunties who keep suggesting various prayer conventions that you should attend, isn’t helping matters much.
Bright side though? Being unmarried isn’t a death sentence. There’s no ring on it yet, yes but It’s YOUR finger.
YOU get to decide if you’ll use it to pull a trigger on yourself or flip society off with it!
The funny thing is, there are quite a number of perks that come with being single. Yes, I said perks and most people never explore this other side while they’re busy swallowing Panadol Extra after yesterday’s night vigil. So here I am, your Lewis AND your Clark, to help y’all discover the opportunities you have blinded yourselves to.
1. You get to keep your figure:
It’s a known fact that girls or women who get involved in serious relationships or marriage tend to just let themselves go. The logic seems to be: ‘well, I’ve been gettin’ my hair and nails  done and hitting the gym coz I wanted to meet someone and now that I have, what’s the point? Bae would love me no matter what I look like. Besides, If he had any complaints,  he wouldn’t be buying me all that chocolate, would he? ‘ In a recent study, 62 percent of couples surveyed said they gained weight after committing to a serious relationship.
62 per cent. That’s well above average.
You on the other hand, still strive and struggle to stay fit ‘coz well, who doesn’t want those stares from the hotties in the weights section.
1205081-Cartoon-Of-A-Fit-Black-Woman-Working-Out-In-A-Gym-With-A-Dumbbell-Royalty-Free-Vector-Clipart

Hi, Boys!

And if your body isn’t where it should be, there’s also more motivation to get in shape so that you do not ‘carry last’ in the long run. So uhh… Get fat too early from romantic gestures from ‘baby boo’ or impress that hot single gym instructor with how long you can stay on the treadmill? Hmmm…tough choice! -_-
2. You sleep better:
‘Beauty sleep’ isn’t just an expression, it’s a precondition if you’re gonna keep looking fresh and glowy. While you’re single, you get it in truckloads and in whatever style, at whatever time and in whatever clothing you choose with little or no disturbances.
211070-Royalty-Free-RF-Clipart-Illustration-Of-A-Relaxed-Brunette-Woman-Sleeping-With-A-Pink-Pillow-And-Blanket
So loud snoring, constant thrashing, sleep talking or *shivers* Dutch ovens? That all falls under marital ‘bliss’. Fly solo on your Queen size bed while you still can.
3. Raise your job opps. considerably:
royalty-free-business-clipart-illustration-45839tn
Another way your single status comes in handy is giving your job applications a boost. Not because of pervy bosses with disgusting libidos, (even though that’s sorta inevitable), most bosses just simply come to the logical conclusion that single people work smarter, are more coordinated and have less distractions than their married counterparts. So in other words, Toke might have the wedding ring but you got the other ring; the phone call from the company you both sent applications to, asking when YOU can start.
1163418-Cartoon-Of-A-Beautiful-Black-Woman-Counting-Her-Money-Royalty-Free-Vector-Clipart

God Bless the Hustle

4. Get up and go:
When you are a single woman, you don’t have the concerns that married chicks do. You can pick up and go anywhere you want, anytime you want, without having to consult with anyone or take rain checks because something came up or your kid’s graduation ceremony takes priority. You might occasionally feel that you have too much empty time on your hands, but you can fill that time any way that you want with whatever you want, which should be especially easy if you’re an extrovert or have a creative mind.

5. Get to know you:
A lot of women let marriage or society’s opinion of a woman’s role, define them, which leaves them with absolutely no idea of who they are or what they are capable of. Not having an ambition or personal principles or goals and aspirations, is a terrible thing. Therefore, if the universe was kind enough to not entrap you in too-early-a-marriage, it leaves time for you to go on a self discovery mission and find out who *insert name here* really is and what she’s all about.

1061106-Silhouetted-Yoga-Woman-With-Plants-And-Butterflies-Against-A-Sunset-Royalty-Free-Vector-Clip-Art-Illustration
A man should be dessert; you’re the main course.
6. Turn Valentines Day into Gal-entine’s Day:
1107592-Clipart-Three-Girlfriends-Talking-And-Getting-Pedicures-In-A-Salon-Royalty-Free-Vector-Illustration
Who died and made February 14th for couples only? While the love birds are stuffing their faces with chocolate and expensive wine, you could dedicate that day to having a fun day or night out with the girls or just having some awesome me-time with a movie or some music.
The bottom line? Pity parties are lame! Actual parties? Awesome! And you’re never too old to have a great time, so do.
DISCLAIMER: While I discourage pity-parties and self-loathing, I am also not an advocate for that new age liberated independent woman bullshit. You DO need a significant other in your life; no-one can exist as an Island. Mr. Right will come. He should. And when he does, you better let him in. But in the meantime, all I ask is that you LIVE.
You’ll find something the second you stop looking for it. A watched pot never boils.
I want to hear your thoughts; whether or not they’re different from mine.
Share with single ladies all over and follow the blog for more. 😉

Saturday Standouts 6/14/14

Rachel's Beauty Bites

Hey Loves! Happy weekend, I hope it’s starting out lovely for you. 🙂 The weather kind of took a turn here and brough on some rain the past couple of days, but it’s still refreshing and makes everything green and grow so no complaints here. 🙂

Okay, so I know I say this every single week but this Saturday Standouts is SO awesome, I have some amazing products I’ve been adoring this past week, and most of them new. ❤ As always, let me know in the comments below your thoughts, any questions or anything that’s on your mind. I love talking with you all more than anything. 🙂

Product ❤ #1: Gerard Cosmetics BB+ Illumination $36

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So this is new for me, I’d seen WAY too many amazing reviews on this so I finally couldn’t take it anymore and I ordered it. 😛 This is an…

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